The Curse of the Weeping Woman

Rated: MThe Curse of the Weeping Woman

Directed by: Michael Chaves

Written by: Mikki Daughtry and Tobias Iaconis

Produced by: James Wan, Gary Dauberman and Emile Gladstone

Starring: Linda Cardellini, Raymond Cruz, Patricia Velasquez, Marisol Ramirez, Sean Patrick Thomas, Jaynee-Lynne Kinchen and Roman Christou.

Based on the Hispanic folk tale of La Llorona, The Weeping Woman, the film begins where the curse began – the 1600s, Mexico.

Llorona, famed for her beauty, catches the eye of a rich man who rides into her small village.  Marrying the man of her dreams, she bares two children.  The folk tale describes Llorona flying into a jealous rage when she finds her husband in the arms of a younger woman; her revenge, to kill those he prizes the most.  His children.

She drowns his children.  But when she realises what she’s done, guilt consumes her so she throws herself in the same waters, to drown.  But her spirit remains to haunt, looking for children to replace the ones she has lost.

The film starts scary, with some surprising, brutal moments and angled camera shots that tilt the view through the eyes of the spirit, Llorona (Marisol Ramirez).

Yet as the film progresses, those creaking doors start to lose effect.

In present day Los Angeles, 1973, Anna Garcia (Linda Cardellini) lives as a single mum with two kids, Chris (Roman Christou) and Samantha (Jaynee-Lynne Kinchen).

Working as a social worker, she struggles to balance life, to spend enough time with her kids and to take care of everything on her own.

But it’s a happy family.

Until, visiting Patricia (Patricia Valásquez), a client she knows through work, where she finds children locked behind a closet door covered in drawn eyes.

Thinking she’s saving the children, Anna unwittingly catches the attention of the Weeping Woman.  A spirit determined to drown her children.

It all sounds like a good scary story.  But l lost focus along the way with moments that left me wondering, how does a baseball bat scare off a spirit?

And social workers don’t investigate other colleagues when it comes their children’s welfare.  Well, not officially.

Then along comes the ex-priest – not the one still with the church who loses all credibility when mentioning his dealings with the evil possessed doll, Annabelle.  But the faith healer, Rafael Olvera (Raymond Cruz).

I just could not take him seriously.  And neither could the Garcia family he’s trying to save when he gets them to rub intact eggs along the frames of doorways.

It was like the director realised the film was turning from horror to ridiculous and then used an incredibly dry humour to lift the film from drowning in a wash of boredom.

The film becomes borderline silly with lace and doe-eyed moments stated in dialogue like, ‘She’s come to drown us.’

I felt pretty water-logged.

But then I realised the irony of the faith healer’s humour against the murderous crazy spirit who drowns kids.

Overall, a lost opportunity that turned a horror movie into, something else.

Five Feet Apart

Rated: MFive Feet Apart

Directed by: Justin Baldoni

Written by: Justin Baldoni & Tobias Iaconis

Produced by: Cathy Shulman, Justin Baldoni

Starring: Haley Lu Richardson, Cole Sprouse, Moises Arias, Kimberly Hébert Gregory, Paraminder Nagra, Claire Forlani.

Based on the fact people suffering from cystic fibrosis can’t touch each other because of risk of contamination, transference of bacteria; infection, Five Feet Apart is a romance between two teens: cute-as-a-button Stella (Haley Lu Richardson), who deals with her illness by controlling everything in her environment; and rebel, Will (Cole Sprouse) who now carries the bacteria strain Burkholderia cepacia, or B. cepacia for short, making any chance of lung transplant impossible.

Added to a bleak future, the bacteria’s easily transferred by casual contact, so the CF sufferers must stay six feet apart.

You’ll find out why the film’s named Five Feet Apart if you decide to expose yourself, not to the bacteria, but a film made specifically to make you cry, using every trick in the book.

Writer and director Justin Baldoni came up with the idea of this romance while shooting his 2012 series My Last Days.

While filming an episode about CF he met Claire Wineland, “One day I asked Claire if she’d ever dated anybody with CF. Claire kind of looked at me like I was stupid.

She said, ‘of course not’

And I said, ‘wait, why not?’

That’s when she explained that people living with CF can’t get closer than six feet because they could pass on dangerous bacteria to people with CF.

Once she said that, I had so many reactions,” he recalls.

Five Feet Apart is set in a hospital following CF sufferers while they contemplate their mortality.  Even with a lung transplant, the shelf-life of the new lungs are five years, while waiting to die, drowning in their own secretions.

Walking into this film, I wondered if I was going to get sucky, cheesy, teary or romantic.  None of these options was particularly appealing.

And I have to say the film is all the above.

My God, people were sobbing in the cinema.

I personally couldn’t wait until it was over.

If you like a romance, then the idea of lovers falling for each other but unable to touch is a potent idea.

Forbidden fruit and all that.

And the character, Poe (Moises Arias), Stella’s best gay buddy coming out with statements about Stella’s anal-retentive behaviour helped lighten the film, a bit: ‘I know you Stella, organising a med cart is like foreplay’.

And Cole Sprouse as Will is dreamy – even with nasal tubing.

But the whole film is riddled with slow motion takes with the underlying cheesy soundtrack.

I know I know, Brian Tyler is a very famous composer (of over 70 films including Avengers: Age of Ultron, Furious 7, Iron Man 3, and Thor: The Dark World and recently Crazy Rich Asians featuring a big band jazz and romantic string score that was voted to the 2019 Oscar shortlist for Best Score…!); but it felt so contrived, to me…

Just to re-cap: Teens, sick in hospital, fall in love, but if they kiss, they will die.  All set to that teen romance music – sobbing with tubing inserted and attached to a ventilator included.

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